fury part 1: captive

PRISONER, that's what i am from the past 21years of my life. a prisoner in my captive surroundings, my relations, society, friends, parents, relatives, moral conventions. i am sick of world's hypocrisy, greed, possessiveness, competition, politics, adulation, gossiping bitches and dick tongue backbiters. 

i want to capture all the people in a large shit hole where all the pimps and the bastards and the whores and all the scum of our modern urban society will smother to death. But they can’t only die from the bad stink so steal the intercontinental ballistic launcher and bomb that filthy shit hole which became filthy only after the admission of those fucking superficial cunts before it was just a large shit hole. after bombing the place with the ultra nuclear missile I’ll submerge the whole god damn place in the shit worm's urinate and let it sink to hell.

but i really can't do it cause I’d been also a captive of passivity. Though out of frustration and anger i thought of turning into a psychopathic serial killer to ease myself but I don't have a border line personality disorder either but i do believe in myself being a schizoid. 

i only find peace in my dreams and illusions and movies and stories coz they let me live in a world of freedom, adventure, instantaneous moment where my emancipating stimulus can prevail till eternity. where i can be whatever i want to where i can evolve but then these illusions are momentary and fragile thus breached by the daily routines and people in the surroundings performing the mechanical rituals.

try to breathe but get suffocated, try to create but get wrecked, try to fly but catch a bad fall, try to bungy jump from my coop but my prisoner chains are to short and rigid to fall and they are heavier then me and my dreams. the only-thing a learn from this captivity is pleasure in pain and pathetically living like a big limbless reptile crawling through a dirty sewer. these manacles has enslaved me and even confine me from self-destruction.

my dark side is growing day by day. i started to see things differently but also horribly. I am a 

ticking TIME BOMB which can explode and spread havoc and epidemic to the world. i want to ravage and relinquish my rage and violence on the parafinnated society and burn it to ashes till the tranquilized world open their eyes in freedom and truth.

but then what a CAPTIVE can do?